seriously

When I was working I didn’t have time to relax and enjoy my house.  After work I had to pick up the kids from daycare, stop at the supermarket sometimes and run home to fix dinner.  On weekends I was busy cleaning, doing laundry, preparing for work and entertaining the kids.  When I found myself ready to walk out the door one day with my daughter in my arms as I woke my son, to get ready for school, he informed me that it was Sunday.  I realized then that I had gone into some kind of robotic existence.  I wasn’t stopping long enough to notice the days of the week.  It was my wake up call.  I had to decide then and there if this was what I wanted or needed.  It didn’t bother my husband that I’d turned into a robot.  He wasn’t suffering.  I was bringing home a second income and taking care of everyone’s needs at home and at work.  Why care?  It was me who was bearing the brunt of  this smooth running operation called my household.  My efficiency in being able to juggle a house, a very stressful full time job and children was wonderful for him.  All he had to do was go to work and come home.  I cried as I realized how unfair this was.  I decided to leave my job and concentrate on just my home and family.  Was this the right decision?  Yes and no.

It is wonderful to have peace in my house during the day.  I am free to clean, decorate, take care of those household

and sometimes read.  I tend to the necessities we used to be to busy to tend to.   I was available to the kids.    My son has graduated and is on his own for the second time.  It is great to have the time to actually see my house and enjoy it.  I don’t have to stress out when school is not in session or during the summer about childcare.  I’m also not paying huge sums for it.  On the other hand I’m not in the workforce anymore.  It will be hard to get back.  Our household is feeling the pinch of surviving on one salary.  My husband resents it.

I have decided that working mothers have a very hard time both emotionally and physically.  I did the juggling act for years.  My two children were born while my husband and I were on active military duty.  The childcare available to us was excellent but I missed my son’s first steps and who knows what else.  I was a working mom.

I think most women who work do so because they need the financial security and the emotional well being that working provides.  Being at home satisfies my need to be the master of my domain but doesn’t help financially.  Working at home is not as much of an option as we’re often told.  In my desire to remain flexible I pursued a career in real estate.  That was great for putting another feather in my cap but not good financially.  It costs a pretty penny to get and keep a real estate license.  It also costs you money to market any homes you try to sell.  You must be out of your home to service clients and keep abreast of what is going on.   Some realtors say they work from home but I think they exaggerate.

Is there a happy medium between working and staying at home?  I don’t think so.  At best I would advise any working woman to keep your network close to you if you leave the workforce.  Most of us who leave it want to return to work in the future.  If you can use your network to help you when you are ready to reenter it will ease the transition.  Being at home is great for you and your family.  Getting back to work is tough.  I will eventually bump into a job that will be worth leaving my house every day but until then I will enjoy my time at home.  Seriously!

Trackback URI | Comments RSS